I Have Three Hearts Beating

Well AP finally felt it was time to announce the awesome news of our twosome surprise. So now that I am officially part of the pregnancy club (15 weeks and counting) I would like to share some information that was not told to me (jb112 likes to keep secrets).

I in no way claim this is true for everyone, but I'm sure most of it applies to at least 20% of the pregnant population.

Things I didn't know:
1. You never ever poop and when you do it rips out your colon
2. Your vagina will produce copious (and I mean copious) amounts of "discharge"
3. Your nipples get GIANT
4. You will have the need to pee every half hour
5. A good night's rest will consist of three constant hours sleep
6. You will be the horniest you've ever been ever

Things I knew but stuff was left out:
1. If you already have big boobs you will now become a "G" or greater
2. Morning sickness is all fucking day sickness and it feels like you are constantly on the verge of puking
3. Your sense of smell isn't just increased it is super human. You will smell everything...everything.

Awesome things:
1. The first time you feel them move the world stands still and for whatever reason you try to be uber quiet so you can feel it again
2. Your partner will be awesome and make you food, do your laundry, and generally love you
3. Your orgasms are the most amazing ever. Seriously. They rock.
4. Random men will hit on you for no reason at all